NO!

Mystery is evoked in trying to fathom and unravel the meaning of the above topic. I couldn’t say more or less. The infamous cliché goes, and I quote, “It takes two to tango” Well, nothing could be further from the truth. It takes a couple to make a relationship. I don’t subscribe to the gay or lesbian ideology. I am a sane man to say the least and my Christian faith founded on a strong Christian background doesn’t allow me to even try and believe in same sex relationships. In my two letter topic above, am going to delve into the anonymous world of a couple. Not literally, but fictional. It’s a story about a couple in my head, and that makes the entire script fictional to its every detail. Take a seat and feed your mind.
Kate was excited; she had the excitement of a hundred million people at the swearing in ceremony of their presidential candidate. She sat in front of the mirror, her face glowing with splendour, her infectious smile would have enticed the woman in the mirror to come out and hug her. The fragrance she released into the atmosphere would have made the clouds come down just to offer her a complimentary shade wherever she went. She was beautiful, her makeup was carefully aligned upon her glowing face and nothing was done wrong. Her hairstyle was probably designed by some fashion icon from Italy and her golden shoes were probably the one Cinderella was trying to find, after all, she was the modern day Cinderella.
Back in church, people were seated, waiting in anticipation. The octogenarian bishop had not yet arrived, but the choir kept the faithful crowd busy enjoying rare tunes from the melodic refrain echoed out from the sweet morning bird voices of the church’s infamous choir. The aisle was spotlessly clean, adorned with a scarlet red carpet. This was neither a presidential attendance nor a VIP baptism date. This was Kate’s wedding day and the nuptials were in order, carefully planned like the reverberating intonation of the sol-fa ladder. Happiness was a must for everybody and a smile was the best dress you could wear in such an occasion.
Where there is a bride, there is a groom. Kindly refer to the number of people it takes to tango. William was not so excited. His expensive tuxedo suit may have fit in perfectly on his athletic body, but he was not excited at all. He probably had mixed feelings. His groom’s men were ready, all set and smelling good, like they hired someone who knows the ingredients of designer perfumes. Just a scent from them would be enough to give you a sneak peek into the wedding ceremony. As a matter of fact, inhaling a scent from them was all you needed to tell people how good the wedding was.
The fleet of vehicles was ready, and these were not just vehicles, these were machines, the kind of machines only owned by wealthy people. There was a Lamborghini in the fleet, a Porsche, a Ferrari, I must have envisioned a Hummer, and by its décor, it must have been the one William was going to travel in. It was all set, as he was the man of the day. This was clearly no cheap wedding. If you had to be there, you had to have an invitation, may be after careful scrutiny of who you were and a bank statement from either Barclays bank or may be World Bank. There were no chances for opportunists and gate crashers here. The steroid packed gigantic men would have whisked you away like some floating feather in a light wind. If you loved your life, you wouldn’t even think of coming here to gate crash. The best you would have done was to patiently wait for the story from a third person raconteur who may have also heard it from a bystander rumour monger who might have been lucky enough to see the fleet on its way to church.
Family members were all seated, and if you were careful to analyse them one by one, you would have been a billionaire just by robbing at least three people randomly. It was expensive. The pontiff in his prime age knew the worth of gold as he was not left behind, he had a golden ring, I don’t know the price, but this is where the hip hop goons came up with controversial lines “a car on my neck” “a jet on my wrist”, probably the pontiff had a mansion on his finger. This simply means that the value of the item is worth construction you a house.
The anticipated moment finally came. William walked in. His Italian leather shoes had a cordial relationship with the red carpet as every step he made assured the carpet of a healthy relationship. His was a majestic and calculated step towards the aisle. In his mind, a lot of thoughts engulfed him. He had been through a lot with Kate; he had a fare share of a crooked history. Kate was equally a dream and nightmare with equal measure. He dreaded this moment. Sometime back in his dating history, he found a picture of Kate with another man in bed, Kate was cheating on him. It was never the first time. William made a choice; he walked to the pulpit anyway, oblivious of the wayward archives of his recent history with this Kate of a woman. On the eve of his wedding he received news that Kate had an affair with one of her exes. He never talked about that, he boldly and confidently walked to the pulpit, all smiles and waiting for his elegant bride.
Kate walked in; her majestic entrance turned all the necks about 45 degrees back. She is the kind of woman you would wish to marry. I must confess that all the potential bachelors in the congregation must have been jealous by the attention she must have summoned upon her untimely entrance into the church. Am sure some of them would have wished that William dies so that they may have the opportunity to at least have a chance with her. She was on a whole new level. The flower girls walking behind her leaving a trail of flowers at every inch she covered with her expensive wedding dress that extended a few metres behind her curvaceous booty.
William smiled as he received her on the pulpit as the crowd watched in awe and amazement. The Pontiff signalled his congregation to stand up, of which they all did before he uttered a prayer dedicating this ceremony to Christ. “Before I proceed, who has an issue to air?” The bishop asked. No one responded, just a quiet congregation staring at each other probably anticipating on who would pull a stunt on this kind of blessed occasion. The Bishop reiterated back, “who is against this union before I join these couples?” No one responded again, so he grabbed his bible and read the scriptures. “Whoever findeth a good woman hath found favour with the load” William nodded with agreement, looking into the shining face of his wife to be. A few words of wisdom laced up the bishops lips before he proceeded to join the couples.
He took a careful look into William’s face and looked to the other side where this Cinderella of a beau was all smiles, of course he smiled back and asked the million dollar question, “Do you Kate take William to be your lawfully wedded husband, in sickness and in health, in wealth and poverty till death do you part?” “Yes I do” she uttered jubilantly as the congregation followed with excitement as ululations occupied the church’s atmosphere. Kate’s father was equally happy as he did not want to show much of his excitement, so he just let out the little smile and watched as emotions ran high for Kate’s mum who could not hold it back. Tears welled her eyes and watered her cheeks freely as her tears cascaded down caressing every bit of her Sephora make up.
The bishop cleared his throat once more, just to signal the church that he was ready to proceed with the wedding ceremony. There was a moment of calculated silence as the murmurings died out slowly from corner to corner. After the bishop summoned an accumulated amount of calm and silence, he cleared his throat once more and opened the scriptures as usual. He then proceeded to ask the million dollar question, “Do you, Mr. William take Kate as your lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health; in riches and in poverty till death do you part?” William took a look into the face of his lovely wife to be, cleared his throat and opened his mouth. Just before he talked, a gunshot was heard from the crowd. . .